Longest Marriage in my family Tree

Dear Grandparents,
Last week a friend posted a photograph of her parents who celebrated the 50th anniversary of their wedding last Saturday. That kicked off a discussion of which of my ancestors had the longest marriage.

The first couple that came to mind, was my paternal grandparents, Charles Newton and Hazel Bynon (Allen) Cone. They were married 4 September 1926 in Memphis, Tennessee and she died 18 July 1980 for just under 53 years of marriage.

Copy of  Marriage License for Charles N. Cone and Hazel Allen issued 31 August 1927
Memphis, Tennessee from the author's collection.

My paternal great grandparents beat that record. Frederick Naaman and Helen Brown (Newton) Cone were married 29 May 1889 in Worthington, Minnesota. She died 20 January 1950 so they were married just under 61 years.

Certificate of Marriage for Frederick N. Cone and Helen B. Newton
dated 29 May 1889. The marriage was performed by Franklin L. Fisk, Pastor of the Congregational Church
Worthington, Minnesota. Original in author's possession.

A maternal first cousin once removed, Juanita Werst, and her husband, Ralph Silver, were married 12 September 1936 in Wallowa, Oregon. Their marriage lasted until her death 17 September 2001, a total of 64 years, 11 months and 19 days. Information about their marriage comes from her obituary which was published in the LaGrande (Oregon) Observer and is posted on Find A Grave Memorial #80539585.

My son-in-law Chris' 3rd great grandparents, Thomas Crammore and Sarah Caroline (Dismukes) Phillips, seemed to take the record. They were married 30 October 1851 in Meriweather, Georgia and their marriage lasted until his death 4 May 1921 in Henderson, Texas. They were married 69 years, 5 months and 15 days. (www.ancestry.com, Georgia, Marriage Records From Select Counties, 1828-1978, 2013.) An index listing this marriage is also posted under Meriwether County, Georgia Marriage by Groom 1851-1875.

These are all envious records and all involved dates into the 20th century so I certainly did not expect to find the marriage of longest duration in my family tree beginning in the 17th century. After all, life expectancy had increased dramatically, right? Yet the longest lasting marriage among my ancestors began with the uniting of Ebenezer and Hannah (Ayer) Belknap 25 February 1690 in Haverhill, Massachusetts. The marriage lasted until his death 17 November 1761, an astounding 71 years, 8 months and 2 days.

I know, you are skeptical! There really are several sources of documentation.

David Webster Hoyt provided the lineage of the Ayer family in his "The Old Families of Salisbury and Amesbury, Massachusetts" published by the Genealogical Publishing Company in 1897. He lists on page 39 the descendants of Nathaniel Ayer including: 52 Hannah, "b. Dec. 19, 1672 [Hv]; ;m. Feb. 25, 1690-1 [Hv], Ebenezer Belknap. She d. Nov., 1779, almost 107 years old. [Hv]"

Under a chapter entitled Remarkable inftances of Longevity in "The History of New Hampshire: Comprehending The Events of one complete Century and seventy-five years from the discovery of the River Pascataqua to the year one thousand seven hundred and ninety" written by Jeremy Belknap, D.D. published in Boston, 1813, one finds, "In Atkinson, Ebenezer Belknap died at the age of 95, and his wife at the age of 107 (page 190).

The exact years, months and days of marriages provided are part of the genealogy software I use, Legacy Family Tree 8.0. There are a series of statistical reports that list, among others, "Longest Marriages by Century." It is a great tool (but I can always use your help!).

Love,
Cecily

Betty Lorraine Werst Cone would be 89 today.

Dear Mom,
Happy Birthday! Before the last five years of your life, I think we all expected you to be here celebrating this day that would have been your 89th birthday. Unfortunately, dementia robbed us and you of this celebration. It's been two years since you left us and slowly, very slowly, I am beginning to recapture the loving and supportive mother of my childhood. At the same time, letting go of seeing you in such a debilitated state.

For most of the nearly nine decades of your life, you were so vibrant.

Betty Lorraine Werst on left with mother Grace (Colby) Werst and sister Helen Werst
circa 1928 either Spokane or Pendleton, from author's private collection.

With her Grandfather William Wallace Colby at Pine Lawn Farm, Newberg, Oregon
circa 1935 from author's private collection.

As a coed at Oregon State College, Corvallis circa 1948

You were justly proud of being the first person in your family to graduate from college. Earning your degree in Home Economics with a major in Clothing and Textile Design and a minor in child development. That minor was put to good use during the 1950s when you and Dad welcomed four children to your family in six years.

Cone Family in LaHabra, California circa November 1956
from left back row Cecily, Chuck holding Trude, Betty holding Rusty and Peg in front

The sixties brought big changes for our west coast family. Moving to Willingboro, New Jersey was completely out of everyone's comfort zone. But you took it in stride, joining PTA, Community Concerts, the Home Economics Council and herding your four children to adulthood.

Cone Family in Willingboro circa 1963
From back left Betty, Chuck, Cecily, in front Rusty, Trude, Peggy

The seventies were busy, graduations, weddings and a move to Charlotte, North Carolina. The south.... another completly different climate and culture for a girl from the Pacific Northwest. Once again you bloomed where you were planted.

Wedding reception for Ed and Cecily United States Naval Academy Alumni House June 11, 1971

Proud Mom at Rusty's Naval Academy Graduation
Annapolis, Maryland June 1978

Wedding of Trude and Kees Schipper Willingboro December 1978
From left Chuck, Ed, Cecily, Trude, Kees and Betty.

Cone-Gorman Wedding June 28, 1979 Medford, New Jersey
From left Peggy, Trude, Betty, Chuck, Patty, Rusty, Cecily and Ed.

Betty at home in Charlotte 

The eighties brought the arrival of grandchildren, four in three years, and the dawn of Betty Cone's World Wide Moving and Health Care Services. Your children all benefited from your help with new babies, drives across country, packing and much more.

Grandchildren Kristen and Bobby Cone with Betty in Allen, Texas

Betty with granddaughters Colby and Amanda Kelly in Charlotte, North Carolina

The loss of Dad in October 1992, was a blow I can only imagine but you found a way to go on with life, have fun and still be there for friends and family. Keeping track of a family spread from Europe to California was no easy task. You visited all of us, found a new love at home and welcomed another grandchild.

At Peg's and Hugh's wedding in Roswell, New Mexico 1993
from left Betty, Cecily, Trude, Peg, Hugh, Paul, and Rusty

Trude, Rein and Mom in Amsterdam 1994

Doing Tai Chi in her seventies.

The last time with all four kids.
Back from left Peggy, Hugh, Trude, in front Cecily, Betty and Rusty
Golden, Colorado circa 2012

As much as we miss you, we are also relieved that you are no longer suffering.
Happy Birthday Mom!

Love,
Cecily

Happy Birthday Trude

Dear Grandparents,
Lots of things have happened in our family on June 16th. My 9th great grandmother, Alice (Richards) Bradford, was born in 1627;  9th great grandfather, Thomas Orton, married Margaret (perhaps Pell) in Windsor, Connecticut in 1641; and widowed 7th great grandmother, Elizabeth Janse (Douwz) Van Eps, married Teunis Pieterse Viele in 1693 in Albany, New York.

Image from www.ancestry.com U.S Dutch Reformed Church Records from Selected States 1660-1926

The family event that I remember most was the birth of my little sister, Trude Lorraine Cone. My family was renting a house in Los Nietos, a little town south of Whittier, California when my mother was expecting. Both my sister Leslie and I had been delivered by family friend Dr. Walter Brodie at Emanuel Maternity Hospital in Portland. Both sets of grandparents were in Oregon and our Dad was spending quite a bit of time at sea with the U. S. Navy. It was decided to take the family back to Oregon to await the delivery. Dad took leave and accompanied us north. I do not remember if he drove us (mother did not yet have a driver's license) or if we flew.

Dad had hoped that Trude would arrive before his leave was up and he had to return to the ship. As we all know, babies arrive on their own schedules and Trude had her own schedule from the beginning. Dad had to leave before she arrived on June 16th weighing 8 pounds 14 ounces.

Trude in her Mother's arms circa June 1954, Newberg, Oregon

Her red hair made an immediate statement and she has been making unique statements ever since.

Trude circa 1955 LaHabra, California

From left sisters Leslie "Peggy", Trude and Cecily at home in LaHabra circa 1959

Trude fell in love with dance and as a graduate of The Julliard School has pursued dance and the study of movement in a very successful career, Her sisters were not similarly talented and pursued their careers in other fields.

Celebrating her 18th birthday at home in Willingboro, N.J.

A much loved daughter, sister, wife, aunt and mother, Trude has conquered living in another culture, becoming fluent in Dutch, having a successful career in Holland, having a special needs son, Rein, and being widowed and finding another love. She has remained close to her siblings and nieces and nephews. An unabashed free spirit, she remains a delight in our lives. Happy Birthday!

Love,
Cecy

Celebrating Anniversaries

Dear Mom, Dad and Ed,

Happy Anniversary! We share June 11th as our wedding anniversary. I do not know exactly you selected the eleventh as the date for your wedding, except that it was a Saturday. I do know part of the motivation. It never seemed to bother Dad that Mom was almost a year older, but it did bother Mom. Each year from June 8th (Dad's birthday) until June 23rd (Mom's birthday) you were the same age.

Charles Newton "Chuck" Cone, Jr. and Betty Lorraine (Werst) Cone
St. Stephen's Cathedral, Portland, Oregon
June 11, 1949
Photograph from author's private collection

Ed's and my motivation for selecting the 11th was much simpler. We were joining perhaps seventy-five U. S. Naval Academy Class of 1971 graduates who would marry in the two weeks following their graduation June 9, 1971. A lottery was held among the classmates and date and time were selected based on what was left when it was your turn. Wedding ceremonies began at 1:00 pm on Wednesday the 9th and continued on the hour in the main chapel and on the half hour in the smaller chapel downstairs. Ed selected 1:00 pm on Friday the 11th. It was an added bonus that it was also my parents wedding anniversary.

From left: Chuck and Betty Cone, Cecily (Cone) Kelly, Edward Kelly, Pauline (Haas) Della Penna and Carmen Della Penna
U. S. Naval Academy, Annapolis, Maryland
June 11, 1971
Photograph from author's private collection

June 11th turned out to be an auspicious day to marry. Mom and Dad were married for more that 43 years before his death in 1992. This year Ed and I are celebrating our 44th anniversary.

A very special day for us, after 44 years, 2 children, 2 grandchildren, 8 dogs, 24 moves, living on 3 continents, we are still in love and looking forward to many more anniversaries.

Love,
Cecily